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Eric Doesn’t Allow Comments on his Blog

July 22nd, 2003 · 7 Comments · Potpourri

So I’ll just say this here.

I saw the 8-minute Batman thing. I want a better-quality copy of it. Spoilers Ahead

I like it quite a bit, and not for the reasons all the painty-waists and virgins are creaming over it. I like it because it is what they intended it to be: a promotion to show off what these guys can do. If it were about the writing, it wouldn’t be 8-minutes long. You just can’t write a complete and entertaining 8-minute action script.

But the filmmaking was great. They used recognizable characters so that they didn’t have to convince anyone that their own creations were cool. These are all icons whose coolness are proven and taken for granted. Sure, taken out of the context of a very well done promotional reel, “Batman vs. Joker vs. Alien vs. Predator” sounds pretty fucking ridiculous. But it was a great way to show that these guys can make a pretty damn good looking flick, and that Batman doesn’t have to suck.

Not that there haven’t been well-loved comic books with worse crossover plots.

Of course, I see in other areas that Eric follows the fanboys he chastises. He takes the party line on Alien 3 and Alien: Resurrection. Alien 3 wasn’t great. But I absolutely loved Resurrection. Come on, Ron Perlman… WINONA RIDER.

Hell, I can’t even watch Ridley Scott’s first Alien flick anymore. It looks really bad these days. I’ve seen scarier looking characters on Sesame Street.

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7 Comments so far ↓

  • Eric

    Okay:

    1) Ron Perlman owns.
    2) I give Ridley Scott props for introducing the alien series to the world in a not-terrible first movie, but all this nonsense people spout about it being this “gothic horror masterpiece” is laughable, always has been. James Cameron’s franchise entry is ten kinds of kickass, proving that at one point in his career, he had serious man-balls.
    3) The Batman short has made me so infuriated mostly on account of how people are freaking out about it being “the best Batman ever”, (tales of comic con fans outright applauding at Alex Ross-lifted shots) Well, no, it isn’t, but I was expecting a serious movie from this thing. Only eight minutes long, yeah, but that’s a heckuva lot longer than it takes to read any number of single comic book issues these days.
    4) The single worst comic book/movie crossover in history is unquestionably WildC.A.T.s vs. Aliens, in which the aliens kill just about every single member of StormWatch, Wildstorm Comics’ equivalent of Justice League or the Avengers. All of them. Offscreen. In someone else’s comic book. In a crossover with the fucking creatures Sigourney Weaver can kill. I swear, Warren Ellis is such a fucking idiot sometimes.
    5) To play devil’s advocate here and actually defend Ridley Scott, I will say that some of those Sesame Street characters are pretty scary in the first place.
    6) Ron Perlman still owns. It would be sweet to have this big budget Hollywood movie where the leads are played by him, Bruce Campbell, George Takei, Christopher Walken, and Chow Yun-Fat.
    7) Alien 4 is still ass, for reasons not the least of which was the butchering of what was surely a great Joss Whedon script. But I’ve actually woken up at a decent hour today (in defiance of modern physics), from a nightmare where I had to explain to some jackass customer just why “Kung Pow: Enter the Fist” was not the “stupidest movie I’ve ever seen in my entire life!”, a dream which is all to close to reality. I’m in no mood to justify this further. Or spell-check.

  • Farris

    Heh, there’s another gap. I thought Kung Pow was a waste of time.

    But, yes. Ron Perlman is the shit. Another reason I broke with the Trekkie majority and loved Nemesis. Of course, Ron was underused in that flick, but what few scenes remain in the flick were stirring. And he had to do it all with his eyes, since he couldn’t do shit with all that makeup on.

  • Farris

    One other thing: I’m not knocking Ridley Scott. He did an awesome job with what he had at the time, and he also took the helm for my absolute favorite movie of all time: Blade Runner.

  • Johann

    Can you really have spoilers if a flick is 8 minutes long?

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