The Gentle News

Too many Ashleys, too many Robs.

Can’t some of you call yourself Leela or Bob?

Young me knew too many guys with my name.

One was exceptional, the rest were the same.

We were inseparable, and found all the gold,

but somehow we missed out, so the story goes.

If your name is Michael, and mine is Michelle

we’ll write lots of jokes that are boring as hell.

Richard, Ricardo, Harry, and Dick.

Tommy, and Sally, and Nick are all pricks.

Farris, and Ferris, and Donder, and Chris,

I drank too much coffee, now I have to piss.